I so hit a grand slam with that random, OMG-what-am-I-going-to-make-people-comment-about question for you all to enter the giveaway. 391 comments(!), and the best stories in the history of QHH. My apologies if you didn't want me to laugh at them. It is way too late. I thank you for what has seriously been the most delightful week of my blogging career.
I swear I love every single one of the answers, even those (and there were surprisingly many of them) who claimed they could not come up with a worst quilt because they love them all. But I love the stories of woe and horror way more. I love that the term "hot mess" was used no less than eight times. I love that at least three of you admitted to inadvertently turning your quilt into a cone or other 3D shape, rendering it the worst. I love that as a whole, quilters are more than happy to come together to mock our worst attempts and laugh at our trials and tribulations.
We had supply selection foibles:
"My worst quilt might be my first ... the batting is more appropriate for
a sleeping bag - I tried sewing the edges like a pillowcase inside out
then planned to turn it right side out and finish half the top by hand.
But the fluff kept clogging up the feed dogs. So I brilliantly laid
pieces of clear packing tape along the edges ... the thing did flow
smoothly then over the feed dogs ... but the tape never would come off.
To this day you can still hear the "crunching" of dried tape as you
handle the edges."
"I made a baby Comforter with upholstery fabric"
"i tried the quilt as you go method and me being a dumb 16 year old and
not not knowing anything about quilting, did not use batting. i used the
poly fil that you put in stuffed toys, and i crammed them full"
We had awkward family moments:
"The quilt I made last Christmas for my bastardbrotherinlaw. It was
fairly shabbily quilted and made with very little grace. It definitely
tops my worst quilt ever."
"Mine is the first one I made, I gave it to my mom and she put it on the
kitchen table (under the glass). Whenever I sit at that table, I just
end up critiquing it the whole time."
"The worst quilt I ever made really wasn't a bad quilt. It was just that
my husband changed his mind about it. He said he liked it before I
quilted it, but when I finished he said he really didn't."
We had general quilting mishaps that I'll admit I found entertaining:
"I tried a new quilting pattern on (sic) it. It was called dwirling. Let's
just say I don't dwirl well. I can meander, I can loop, I can almost
straight line, but I can not dwirl." (Note: is this like twerking?)
"I'm not even sure
what to call the first quilt (and worst quilt) but I guess it's a
patchwork. A really really UGLY patchwork."
" My worst quilt was one I worked forever to complete, and it bled like a homicide victim."
"I can't believe you're making me relive those horrible moments." (Note: Believe it, babe.)
"My worst quilt is in a landfill somewhere." (Note: Mine too.)
But we also had plenty of this, and it all proves that quilters are the smartest, most forgiving of their own mistakes people in the world, which is only one of the reasons I love preaching to the choir around here:
" If a quilt falls into my yuck category, then it is perfect to practice
FMQ on and then maybe donate it (to the blind?). That way, all is not
"With every quilt I grow and now I accept little errors as part of the charm."
" the worst quilt I ever made is the one still on my bed, my first quilt
and I didn't understand about matching seams or keeping points, but it
still keeps us warm every night"
" You know, I don't have any regrets about any of the quilts I've made,
even though none of them are perfect. I figure they keep people warm,
look reasonably pretty most of the time, and if all else fails, they can
get donated to a homeless shelter and have a second lease on life."
" My worst quilt was my first quilt, a 9-patch memory quilt for my mother.
I didn't know what I was doing when I made it, and whenever I look at
it, I cringe at the awful stipple quilting. But you've got to start
somewhere, and this got me started on a quilting journey that has become
my passion. So no regrets"
I'll say it again. Best ever week of blogging. You all made me so very happy for playing along.
But obviously you are way more interested in learning who is the winner than hearing about my worst quilt ever, made in 1998, with backstitching at each end of every fully 1/4" seam because I knew nothing about chain piecing, made from pinks and greens (a combo I have ALWAYS loathed) because that is what was on the cover of the pattern so I thought it was required that I make it so that it looked like the UNH chapter of Delta Zeta sorority's living room had thrown up (had I made it in my own sorority colors of double blue and gold I am certain I would not have liked it any better, though) with ninety billion points, every single one of which was cut off, tied rather than quilted and just a hot mess from here to Jupiter. So I won't tell you about it.
The winner as picked by the random number generator is #51, Joyce LM, whose comment deserves recognition as honest and awesome.
"The worst quilt I ever made was a Christmas quilt. The fabrics were a
little ugly. And my attempts at FMQ were also ugly. I used some wide
backing fabric in red that attracted every piece of lint, every cat hair
in the house. I gave it to my sister & I hope she made it into a
dog bed (I've never asked). Thanks for the giveaway."
I hope she did too, if that was your wish, Joyce. Congratulations!